From a natural birth plan to planned c-section to emergency c-section:

Like many women I’ve grown up to somewhat fear childbirth. My work as
scientific researcher and my general anxious nature meant I got hold
of all the information around childbirth I could lay my hands on in an
effort to prepare myself for what lay ahead. This led me to hire a
doula to help support us through this journey and facilitate a
low-intervention birth where possible. We also planned the birth at
Our Lady of Lourdes hospital in Drogheda even though we live in
Dublin, because it has one of the only two Midwife-Led Units (MLU) in
Ireland. Also, we live close to the port tunnel, so it's a 40-minute
drive regardless of traffic.

Everything was going great, smooth pregnancy, amazing standard of care
at the MLU and our fantastic doula, Shelley, to guide us through it
all. But as much as we strived for a natural birth, it wasn’t to be.
Our baby was breech at every scan and wouldn’t budge no matter how
many moxibustion sticks we burned and Spinning Babies exercises I did.
I honestly don’t think there’s anything I didn’t try from the
ridiculous (playing music to my crotch) to the even more ridiculous
(doing handstands in my gym pool). The external cephalic version
performed at the hospital at 37 weeks was also unsuccessful. I’m still
glad I know that we tried everything.

When the talk of a c-section was no longer hypothetical and they
scheduled me in for Week 39, it still hit me like a ton of bricks. I
was battling a horrendous chest infection at the time (this was
pre-coronavirus) with several pulled muscles in my chest and I
essentially had to wear adult diapers as each cough made me pee myself
a little. It's safe to say, it wasn't my finest hour and I was feeling
pretty low. On the eve of the second day of ugly crying, Shelley
called over. She was super empathetic and didn't immediately come out
with the "look at the bright side" argument that I just wasn't ready
for yet. Through videos, stories and articles, she was able to show me
that I can still have a calm and beautiful birth. By the end of her
visit, she had managed to help me start accepting this new path of
bringing our baby into the world.

And it's just as well, because just a couple of days later my waters
broke at 9.45 pm on 38+1, one week before the scheduled c-section. I
had been getting ready for bed and Rob was out meeting up with some
friends. Shelley was my next point of call, who reminded me to stay
calm and call the hospital. Rob got back just as I was packing the
remainder of the hospital bag with a towel shoved down my leggings
(how was there still so much water coming out of me?). I figured it
was safer for me to drive to Drogheda than Rob, because we all know
that "a couple of drinks" means more like three or four haha! As luck
would have it, the port tunnel was closed just as I was experiencing
the first contraction. Cue some road rage while detouring through
Drumcondra (were there always this many traffic lights?). Things were
calmer once we hit the M1 and I was able to do some deep breathing
through the contractions.

We arrived in the hospital just before 11 pm. Now that I didn't have
the distraction of driving, it really sunk in that this is it!
Preparations for an emergency c-section were started. It was maybe an
hour of monitoring and answering questions. Shelley arrived in the
meantime and stayed with us until I had to go to theatre. And while I
was being prepped for surgery, she was able to continue to support Rob
(though I'm sure those couple of drinks also helped take the edge
off!).

Nearly all of the surgical team had briefly introduced themselves to
me earlier and it definitely helped that I recognised the various
faces as I walked through the double doors into the bright sterile
room. I could hear the eerie sound of metal from the surgical
equipment being prepared beside me. It was difficult to hold still
during the spinal block while trying to keep fear at bay and breathing
through contractions. At least the surgical table was surprisingly
warm and comfortable. After a few lightning-like sensations down my
legs and up my spine, the spinal block eventually worked and I was
swiftly laid down on my back. I felt a bit like Jesus on the cross
with my arms outstretched and weighed down with monitoring equipment
on both sides. I asked them to hold off until Rob was beside me, but
judging by the metallic smell of iron in the air, the incision was
already made. It is emergency surgery after all. Within a matter of
minutes I could feel the pressure of my baby being laid on my thighs
while they waited for the umbilical cord to stop pulsating. I told Rob
that "you're going to hear the cry now", but it took longer than
expected because our baby was born asleep! When they let us reveal the
gender - a baby girl! - she still had her legs sticking way up in the
air as many breech babies do. Quite funny really. Rob was able to hold
our baby while I was being stitched up, which felt like an eternity,
but was probably only half an hour.

The usual hospital protocol had me go to recovery by myself for an
hour or two, but I was insistent not to miss out on the "golden hour"
with my baby. After a lot of pleading, the wonderful midwives sourced
a room where I could recover with baby on my chest. I was lucky,
because this is not always possible subject to availability of staff
and rooms. While I was being wheeled into recovery, Rob brought our
baby out to meet Shelley and she took some precious first photos for
us. Baby immediately latched when she was placed on my chest in the
recovery room. It was the most amazing feeling in the world! This was
one of my worries with having to go with a c-section, but this
brand-new little creature knew exactly what to do. I was so proud of
her. It was only then that I was able to relax and comprehend that she
was really here and we did it!

The recovery from the section was not easy. I was in hospital for 3
days and it took a few more days at home until I was able to walk
upright. But looking back, I'm really grateful for how everything went
down. Even the fact that our baby got to decide that she was ready.
All of the care we received at Drogheda was excellent and thanks to
Shelley I felt mentally prepared for this birth. If I get to plan for
a VBAC sometime in the future, I really hope it's with Shelley's
support.